Mia Freedman is an Australian writer who has recently gone viral online after writing a deeply personal and emotional blog post about the pain of a child moving out of home and becoming an adult.
The piece originated on MamaMia but has been circling around the world and resonating with parents in similar situations.
You can read an abridged version of Mia's blog post below...
"'Being the mother of a son is like someone breaking up with you really slowly.'"
"Those aren’t my words but they could be. I heard them in a movie recently called The Otherhood (Netflix) about three friends whose sons had grown up and moved out of home. It’s a comedy but a poignant one because at its heart, it examines what it means to be the mother of a son who is no longer a boy, your boy, but a man."
"When I’ve spoken about this topic and repeated that quote, you can hear an instant, primal wave of audible gasps and yelps of pain coming from the audience. Those are the mothers of boys. Some of them still babies. Babies and toddlers and boys who will grow up and grow away and break up with their mothers. Slowly. But surely. Because they need to."
"And if they do – when they do – it means we got it right. We parented them right. Whether you have sons or daughters, our role as parents is ultimately to make ourselves redundant and while I don’t know what it’s like to be the parent of an adult woman, I know what it’s like to stumble as my son became a man."
"I’m still stumbling even though he just turned 22."
"There are so many batshit crazy things about being a parent and one that definitely wasn’t in the brochure is the way you don’t actually parent one person, you parent many, many different people who are all your child."
"There’s the newborn, the baby, the toddler, the pre-schooler, the primary aged kid, the pre-teen, the adolescent, the full-blown teen, the young adult and then the adult. They all answer to the same name. They all call you Mum. And you never ever notice the inflection point where one of those people turns into the next."
"You never get to properly say goodbye to all the little people who grow up because you don’t notice the growing, the changing."
"And now I'm crying as I write this and it’s a grief that feels indulgent and almost insensitive because last week I met a woman whose son died earlier this year after being diagnosed with leukaemia two years ago. His name was Archie and he was three. I have met and interviewed many grieving parents and what they wouldn’t give to experience the kind of soft grief I’m talking about as opposed to the soul-ripping grief of actually losing a child."
"I’m still crying though and this feeling of living loss is very strange and hard to process."
We think Mia really hit the nail on the head, its no wonder so many parents have found solice in her post!